March 2018 – That LARRY SHOW

Episode 78: Dirty Tricks for the Office

How to scam the boss • Sabotage 101 • Stealth destruction of Kumbaya co-workers • Smashing true believers • Retaining your privacy at a “transparent” workplace • Breaking team spirit • Getting with the program as you f**k with the program • Humiliating corporate logo-wear • All this and more!

End of March, spring is sprung, yada-yada. Here’s some creative visualization for you – in your mind’s eye, see an Easter bunny hopping across your lawn with a stick of dynamite strapped to his back with a fizzing fuse. No wait, I like animals. Visualize some idiot in a polyester bunny suit with a bundle of dynamite strapped to his back hopping around on your lawn in a most creepy fashion. Hisssss… BOOM! That’s nothing compared to the Easter goodies coming your way from the TNS Dojo.

First, this Sunday will be a special episode of SINNERS’ SUNDAY, entitled JESUS GOES TO HELL. It will be a milestone in the canon of the SS Ministry. A live tour de force with JC as he meanders around the netherworld before the big Ascension. And only Patrionis get to listen. So join here. Now.

I’ve been teasing a new book and it’s nearly ready – again only for Patrionis. Fed up with greeniacs and enviro-hustlers? So was I. So I wrote a funny picture book (RECYCLE THIS!) that broke their lies and had a deal in place with a big time publisher and at the last minute, they killed the project because they were afraid of blow-back from Al Gore and his moron minions. FUCK THEM!

I don’t do collaborative writing, but in the case of RECYCLE THIS! I made an exception because I fell in love with my co-author, Johnny Glo-Skull. Here he is –

and he is what makes this an interactive book. In select portions, audio comments from Johnny’s voice are embedded – even though he’s been dead for Christ knows how long. You’ll fall in love with Johnny. But remember, he’s my BFF.

I’m still working on the RECYCLE THIS! cover – I’ll post it on Patreon when I’m finished.

Lastly, in a Christ-like act of selflessness, I am offering up me – yes me, live via Google hangouts for your consultative well-being. You’ve got questions/problems? We at the TNS Dojo, with our deep bench of senseis from many disciplines, have the answers. But sometimes, you really need the back and forth of a live conversation to sort things out.

The service isn’t free, but its better (and cheaper) than you’ll get from some psychotropic drug-prescribing, fucked-up-and-trying-to-unfuck-himself-as-others-pay-him head shrinker. There will be a link about this on Patreon, but of you want to set it up, shoot me an email at thatlarryshow@gmail.com.

See you at Sinners Sunday (if you’re a Patrioni.)

Episode 77: TGI Good Friday (Sinners’ Sunday #7)

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The kiss that kills • Bowling for Heroes, mankind’s favorite pastime • Why you should NEVER trust a mob • Should Good Friday be bigger than Easter? • Audio clips from the Last Supper • How to spot a traitor • Surviving betrayal • Who’s your forever buddy? All this and more…

Support the Sinners’ Sunday Ministry

Write to us: thatlarryshow@gmail.com

Episode 76: What Else Died in the Overhead Bin?

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What else died in the overhead bin? • Lies United tells • It was NO ACCIDENT • Why misplaced respect will doom our species • Two words that may SAVE mankind • Words and phrases they use to control us • Punks you should hate • The corporatocracy • This episode will piss you off!

It was just about a year ago that United beat the shit out of a passenger on one of its flights. Adding insult to injury, it’s low I.Q. CEO, Oscar Munoz, initially blamed the victim and then doubled down, blaming him again. (You can hear all about it in episode 19 – here’s the link.)

Incredibly, slow Oscar still has his job. And now one of his authoritarian stewardi has killed a puppy, by ordering it’s child-owner to lock it in a dark, airless, overhead bin, where it clawed and barked in a terrified panic for 2 hours until it suffocated.

Let there be no mistake, I hold Oscar Munoz in contempt and STILL think he is a bucket of assholes and his airline is a shit-bag operation. But that, of course, is just one man’s opinion.

But THIS, my friends, is pure fact. Oscar Munoz is an imbecile. I mean a gibbering, mush- brained, bed-wetting fucktard. And here is the proof, just downloaded from United Airlines’ very own website.

Hubba hubba, if that don’t beat all. You CANNOT make this stuff up. The world is in full pitchfork and torch rage, ready to destroy United Airlines, and these assholes are STILL selling puppy dog stuffed toys on their crappy web site. How’s that for we don’t give a shit tone deaf.

They should add a few lines of copy, like “Stuff ‘em your pocket. Stuff ‘em in your suitcase. Stuff ’em in the overhead bin!” Maybe someone will stuff one down Oscar’s throat – and his pinhead flight attendant.

That said, it wasn’t just an idiot flight attendant that killed that dog. It was a plane full of spineless sheeple who listened to it dying and didn’t do a god damn thing to help it.

Our nations’ most dangerous malaise is the lack of wariness of authority figures – be they in schools, corporations, government or on airplanes — telling a kid to cram a puppy in an overhead bin.

STOP obeying ASSHOLES, America!

Support the show here.

Write to me at thatlarryshow@gmail.com

See you this weekend at Sinners’ Sunday.

Episode 75: How to be a ONE MAN GANG (Sinners’ Sunday #6)

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How to be a One Man Gang • Kicking ass in your lions’ den • Why Bluto was smarter than Daniel – and how you can be, too • What’s a Satrap? • What Human Resources really means • How to avoid lions’ den situations • All this and MORE!

Like the show? Support it here.

Write to me at: thatlarryshow@gmail.com

Episode 74: The Secret of Happiness – REVEALED!

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The secret of happiness – REVEALED! • Larry finds it in Hollywood – but where? • What is the Lunacy Commission of New York State? • TONY SPUMONTE IS BACK! • Who are Marty and Elayne and why are they important to YOU? • 3 false routes to happiness you need to AVOID • How a nut-job saved Tony • All this and more!!!!

Some people see beauty in bacteria. Some people like the taste of blue Gatorade. Those are sick, sick people.

I found the secret of happiness in a joint in Hollywood last Saturday night. I’m not kidding. Not even a little.

So many of us spend our lives flailing around like we’ve been hit with a Benny Hinn Faith-ball, when we could have a laser-like trajectory to the realization of all our dreams. But we get distracted by the crap we’re fed by Hollywood and Madison Avenue. We think we can find happiness in a person, place or thing. That is utter bullshit.

Happiness comes from within. And there’s a way to tap into it all your livelong days, but you’ll have to listen to get that secret.

On the way to happiness, come with me and climb a hidden mountain in Nepal where we find a wise old bearded oracle. What will he tell us? Will it be worth the trek?

We’ll also visit with Tony Spumonte and he’ll regale us with a story of how an escapee from an insane asylum helped him get to a very important meeting and taught him something about car repair and nut-jobs.

That asylum is Creedmoor, in Queens, New York. Parts of it are abandoned (your tax dollars at work). Here’s what it looks like.

Yes, those are drifts of bird shit. They should make politicians from Albany clean up that room by ingesting every disease-coated particle of that bird-shit. Come to think of it, politicians are bird shit. There’s some zen-like message at the core of that. Shit becomes shit or something. When I figure it out, I’ll let you know.

If you want to see more Creedmoor horror, here’s the website from the guy that took that picture and many more.

Next, here’s a picture of the interior of the Dresden Room in Los Angeles, where I discovered the secret of happiness. No, it’s not 80 proof, nor is it décor frozen in 1967 or lighting so dim you need a cell phone to find your cell phone.

Big heap o’ bonus content coming this month, the book I wrote that was killed because the candy-ass publishers feared reprisals from a punk politician that I skewered in the book.

So get over to Patreon.com/thatlarryshow and catch up on all the bonus episodes you’ve missed and then be first on your block to download the book, which will be available any day now. I’ll reveal more about it in next Tuesday’s episode.

Write to me at thatlarryshow@gmail.com.

I’ll see you this weekend at Sinners’ Sunday.

TTFN.

Episode 73: Killing Pissants for Jesus

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JC’s secret nickname revealed • Televangelists – the cool, the crazy the dangerous • The preacher who heals you to death • JC’s nutty, locust eatin’ cousin— explained • Larry’s favorite televangelist • Throwing fast balls of faith • The pointy preacher-ette you’re sure to like •The punishment song for non-donors • All this and MORE!!

Episode 5. I’ll tell you straight up, this is my favorite so far.

Besides revealing JC’s secret nickname, I get into one of my favorite topics.

Televangelists are among the most colorful characters of all time and in this show you’ll meet several of the most vivid… like Daddy Grace, a former cook who had 3 chauffeured limos and owned so many mansions around the US, when he toured, hotels were unnecessary. His main competitor, Father Divine, one-upped Daddy G, claiming he could do more that heal the sick, he could raise the dead.

Meet Cash Luna, once of the biggest right now and discover what wacky shit he’s doing for his flock of suckers.

Have a look at a current star of GOD TV, Benny Hinn – watch him throwing fastballs of faith. They’re so packed with holiness, they knock you on your ass.

Benny Hinn – Bodies Hit the Floor

Most of all, you’ll want to meet the man who inspired me to get myself ordained in several faiths (because versatility is next to holiness), the inimitable Dr. Gene Scott.

Here’s the famed building in downtown L.A. where his messages were broadcast around the world.

Here he is wearing a sombrero containing actual fibers from the shroud of Turin. (I made that up.)

Here he is in a beret made in my favorite city in the word, Paris. (I’m guessing.)

Here’s his scripture quotin’ pointy widow, Melissa. She could lead me to Salvation. Or anyplace else. (I mean that!)

I like to joke around, but I’m dead serious when I say I DIG Dr. Gene Scott. Wish I could have met him. And his widow seems cool as well. I DIG Dr. Gene because he was authentic – nothing phony about him, and clearly, a take no shit kinda guy.

Maybe I’ll attend one of Melissa’s services and do some kind of live stream or something when I do.

Help support the SINNERS’ SUNDAY ministry by clicking here. You know DAMN WELL you get more out of these shows than you ever got sitting in some dingy “house of worship” listening to another sanctimonious fraud. Why do you support them? Ain’t nothing’ fake here, my friends. This is where TRUTH lives, and in this episode, you’ll discover exactly what I mean by TRUTH.

Send me your questions, comments and confessions to thatlarryshow@gmail.com.

Since some of you have already sent me your confessions (for which I have granted absolution), I shall now make a confession of my own.

I regard SINNERS’ SUNDAY as my entry into the PODVANGELIST realm. (Is that a real word , or did I just coin one?) I intend to be the greatest of all time. But I CANNOT do it alone. JC was the Son o’ God, and even he needed 12 dudes to help him get his word out. So support the show through Patreon and if you can’t do that, text a link to anyone you know who might dig it. Spread it around on Facebook, Twitter – eveywhere. You owe this ministry that much.

Thanks.

I’ll see you Tuesday for the regular show.

Peace, love and funky hats.

Episode 72: Larry Warps Time

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Larry warps time • What’s FWOT and how will it fix your life? • Chick time vs. guy time • NY vs. LA time • Why are 25,000 days important to you? • What’s the best hedge against maturity? • Are we our own time bandits? • Larry advises a strong, silent guy on dealing with mean bitches • All this and more!

More notes and commentary tomorrow.

In the meantime, click here and support the show.

Episode 71: Was Jesus a Party Animal?

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.Was Jesus a party animal? • Who were the Sons of Thunder? • Snarky nicknames JC had for his pals • How did JC’s first miracle involve alcohol? • How was JC manipulated by a woman? • Does abstinence make you a better person? • Why JC would have hung out at Sinners’ Sunday • All this and more!

Hey kids, here we are, all dressed up with someplace to go! This is episode 4 of the only show of its kind in the world. And it’s growing every week. The BBQ is hot, the beer is cold, the chix are pointy and I’m on FIRE! The spirit of truth burns in my guts like a shot o’ napalm and I’m bringing it to you raw and unvarnished.

Was Jesus a party animal? Sure looks that way. Also looks like he wasn’t the concave-chested, no-fun killjoy all the phony, mega-buck “God providers” have made him out to be.

In last week’s show, we figured out that if triggered, JC would get plenty pissed off and roar curse words like any red-blooded mensch from the first century, A.D (BTW, we never use that CE thing – that’s Commie shit – pinheads who do can shove that up their flabby, deceitful asses.)

And so we wondered, did people curse any differently 2,000 years ago? No. Listener Andrew Hann did some research and discovered a treasure trove of graffiti transcribed from tavern walls in Pompeii thousands of years ago. Here are a couple of links.

FILTHY GRAFFITI from the Ancients #1

MORE FILTHY GRAFFITI from Pompeii

Ever notice how nitwits, jack-holes and Commies are real big on the “evolved man…” that people are somehow different now than they were millennia ago? That’s bullshit. People are the same as they ever were – only the clothing and devices have changed. Read the Pompeii graffiti and you’ll agree. (I love shooting holes in Commie tenets. Its soooo easy!)

In this episode we discover that JC was a smart aleck who liked to lay snarky nicknames on his besties. They’re pretty damn funny. But did they have a nickname for JC? Savior? Redeemer? Tender Shepherd? Wrong, wrong and wrong.

Come back next week and I’ll tell you the REAL nickname for JC.

In the meantime have another beer and sit back and listen. Then pop over to Patreon and support this holy mission.

The show isn’t going to promote itself. If you dig, it, please send a link to all your friends so we can cover the world.

Got questions / comments / death threats? Lay ‘em on me, at thatlarryshow@gmail.com

I’ll see you Tuesday for the regular edition of That LARRY SHOW.

Peace, love and togetherness.