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How Commies are using Karens, Kids and K-9s to cancel 4th of July ▲ July 4 – THE holiday for MEN ▲ The true meaning of Independence Day ▲ Explosives you should love (and use!) ▲ What YOU need to do to FIGHT BACK! ▲ Why Larry LOVES the 4th of July, and you should too.
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Ahh, those Debbie Downers – they’re everywhere, aren’t they? As the old adage goes, they could fuck up a wet dream. All over Twitter and Facebook are NGOs and individual cretins preaching their wet-blanket gospel of… lowered expectations.
This Fourth of July will be a little bit different they say. And the follow up is the WUHAN FLU (Covid-19 in their PC parlance) caveats.
Wanna hang with family and friends and BBQ? MASK ON!
Wanna protest/loot/burn and destroy shit? No worries! NO MASK NEEDED! You’re Covid protected! It’s a very smart virus! It only attacks who we permit it to attack!
The ancient Chinese curse says “may you live in interesting times.” Interesting times were the frontier days. Or the Roaring 20s. Or watching men land on the moon.
These times are no more interesting than an oozing carbuncle the size of a ping-pong ball. These times are shit. These times are fucked up. Maybe these times are finally the end times. If so, maybe the grand finale will be this 4th of July. Wouldn’t that be special? What if some fist the size of the moon just came out of the clouds and punched the blue planet into cosmic dust? Would the other 8 care if there was one less sphere in the solar system?
Nope.
Maybe part of the earth’s remains would somehow survive the vacuum and cold of space and land on another sphere in a galaxy far-far away and re-seed it. If it did, that planet would also, at some point, be deserving of the mighty cosmic punch. That’s just how things work.
I’ve never been to China. And I never will. The list of places I want to see that are ahead of China preclude any possibility.
But I do like the food. And I like the fireworks. Been a fan of their pyrotechnics since I was knee high to a Ming vase.
Which is what this episode is mostly about.
There are shit-bags in this nation who want to outlaw the 4th of July. Who are they? They’re the same shit-bags who want to delete the 2nd amendment.
I guess they’re just afraid of things that go BANG!
Fuck ’em.
Here are images of things that went bang in my youth. Chinese firecrackers.
The Black Cat was most common. What does a cat have to do with fireworks? Damned if I know. But the packaging is great.
Below is da BOMB. What does a radio tower have to do with fireworks? Ya got me. But something about this image hints that Godzilla is just over the hill, coming for a gazillion ampere snack.
Lastly, the Black Jack pirate. Which does have something to do with fireworks, because Pirates did have cannons and flintlock pistols and did blow shit up.
Back to the Karens and cretins. If they’re not trying to fuck up our fun, they’re insulting us with their tweets. Like this one.
Are Americans really this stupid? Does someone who can pay rent on or purchase a home need to be told not to BBQ inside that home? Ditto for camping/pitching a tent and buying / leasing an RV?
This 4th of July, blow something up.
For you.
For me.
For America.
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