Truth lives at That LARRY SHOW, a weekly sojourn at the crossroads of madness and enlightenment. With LARRY in your life, you'll Take No Sh*t, and laugh your way to victory.
POINTY CHICK PATROL, LIVE!▲The Distant Early Warning system chicks use to evaluate you▲Winning in business & romance ▲ Are you in a “Square Peg” relationship? They’re poison! ▲ The night all of Los Angeles stood up to PC pressure groups ▲ How an insurance company anda contractor tried to screw Larry ▲ All this and more in this heads up episode!
How Commies are using Karens, Kids and K-9s to cancel 4th of July ▲ July 4 – THE holiday for MEN ▲ The true meaning of Independence Day ▲ Explosives you should love (and use!) ▲ What YOU need to do to FIGHT BACK!▲ Why Larry LOVES the 4th of July, and you should too.
Ahh, those Debbie Downers – they’re everywhere, aren’t they? As the old adage goes, they could fuck up a wet dream. All over Twitter and Facebook are NGOs and individual cretins preaching their wet-blanket gospel of… lowered expectations.
This Fourth of July will be a little bit differentthey say. And the follow up is the WUHAN FLU (Covid-19 in their PC parlance) caveats.
Wanna hang with family and friends and BBQ?MASK ON!
Wanna protest/loot/burn and destroy shit? No worries! NO MASK NEEDED! You’re Covid protected! It’s a very smart virus! It only attacks who we permit it to attack!
The ancient Chinese curse says “may you live in interesting times.” Interesting times were the frontier days. Or the Roaring 20s. Or watching men land on the moon.
These times are no more interesting than an oozing carbuncle the size of a ping-pong ball. These times are shit. These times are fucked up. Maybe these times are finally the end times. If so, maybe the grand finale will be this 4th of July. Wouldn’t that be special? What if some fist the size of the moon just came out of the clouds and punched the blue planet into cosmic dust? Would the other 8 care if there was one less sphere in the solar system?
Nope.
Maybe part of the earth’s remains would somehow survive the vacuum and cold of space and land on another sphere in a galaxy far-far away and re-seed it. If it did, that planet would also, at some point, be deserving of the mighty cosmic punch. That’s just how things work.
I’ve never been to China. And I never will. The list of places I want to see that are ahead of China preclude any possibility.
But I do like the food. And I like the fireworks. Been a fan of their pyrotechnics since I was knee high to a Ming vase.
Which is what this episode is mostly about.
There are shit-bags in this nation who want to outlaw the 4th of July. Who are they? They’re the same shit-bags who want to delete the 2nd amendment.
I guess they’re just afraid of things that go BANG!
Fuck ’em.
Here are images of things that went bang in my youth. Chinese firecrackers.
The Black Cat was most common. What does a cat have to do with fireworks? Damned if I know. But the packaging is great.
Below is da BOMB. What does a radio tower have to do with fireworks? Ya got me. But something about this image hints that Godzilla is just over the hill, coming for a gazillion ampere snack.
Lastly, the Black Jack pirate. Which does have something to do with fireworks, because Pirates did have cannons and flintlock pistols and did blow shit up.
Back to the Karens and cretins. If they’re not trying to fuck up our fun, they’re insulting us with their tweets. Like this one.
Are Americans really this stupid? Does someone who can pay rent on or purchase a home need to be told not to BBQ inside that home? Ditto for camping/pitching a tent and buying / leasing an RV?
The secret location where the last sexy Pirelli calendar is still on display ▲ Why Larry went ballistic in a corporate tire store ▲ How car repair outfits rip you off ▲ The can’t-miss marketing platform that guarantees business success ▲ How a merchant made Larry a customer for life ▲ The two “P” words that mean you’re gonna get screwed ▲ What Keurig coffee, Ellen DeGeneres, WiFi and the new Pirelli calendars have in common
Never mind all the NASCAR flap about Bubba Wallace and the noose that turned out to be a garage-door pull-rope. Cancel Culture has had Car Culture in the cross-hairs for decades. When did it begin? That’s hard to say.
As a kid, I used to slide into car dealerships and glom brochures. They rarely cared and if they did, I told the sales guy my old man asked me to get them for him. Car brochures were sort of my pre-puberty porn – post-puberty, too. The photography and art direction that went into brochures for GM’s better lines – namely, Cadillac, Oldsmobile and Buick, were eye-popping and heart-stopping.
And if sensual expanses of sheet metal and curvy chrome weren’t enough, they’d pair the car with some impossibly elegant and sexy woman – usually on the arm of a dude who looked much older than she was. She’d be mid-twenties, fully ripe and juicy. He’s be silver at the temples; vintage, but past his prime. She never seemed to mind.
When I wasn’t looking, all that went away. Now car ads are a fucking snore. Either features and benefits lists or virtue-signaling piles of bullshit. “Subaru cares about you, and the planet, and Covid-19, and social justice and just plug in whatever the next hot cause du jour is and we’ll tell you we care about that, too, because we think you’re stupid and our market research and sales figures are proving you are.”
First, they went after the manufacturers and removed the sex and fun. Seems market research indicates female buyers don’t like sex and fun, and least not in an automotive setting. Which I don’t understand at all. The sex I’ve had in cars was some of the best of my life.
But face it, few women give a size-small damn about the workings of a car. But guys do. Which is why overwhelmingly, DIY car maintenance and customization is still a man’s world. BUT, they (and you can figure out for yourself who they are) demand total hegemony and have come after the automotive aftermarket as well. They want it neutered. It began with the famed (a hack writer would use the word iconic) Pirelli calendar – for decades the zenith of sexy automotive marketing. They spent a couple of million producing each one. They never sold any. It was a promotional giveaway to distributors.
They were magnificent. Look at these images from the 1984 edition.
Sexy as hell. Without a hint of sleaze. That’s a narrow line to toe. But Pirelli did it, year – after year. Until about 2010. Then Pirelli caved to the screaming mob of cretins who find images of beautiful women in beautiful places…offensive.
This is now the caliber of Pirelli calendars.
Crap.
Vacuous, overdone, pointless crap, that has exactly what to do with tires or cars? Please explain, I’ll wait.
In a secret location in the sprawling San Fernando Valley is a decrepit tire store that still displays the 1984 Pirelli calendar, where those riveting images of female perfection first appeared. I will not name the place or the location. Some day, some angry harridan will roll a buggy, rheumy orb over that calendar, snap a picture on her i-Phone (they never use Androids – it’s almost like a law). She will then scream and point and reeeeeeeeee!Until that offensive calendar is removed and burned. Because in this ass-clown PC world, angry, buggy-rheumy-eyed harridans are in control.
Life lessons from Larry’s Dad ■ Henry the Rooster – a house pet for a month ■ How helicopter parents steal from their kids ■ Larry reels in a sea-monster ■ Why are dads bashed by the media? ■ If you have a father, are a father or plan on being a father – this is your episode!
WTF is the “O-SQUAD?”♠ When and how to deploy it for maximum laughs♠ Questions that invite violence ♠ The creepy co-worker who demanded Larry’s friendship ♠ How to light anyone’s fuse ♠ Dealing with a problem mother-in-law ♠ How a cop and a purse snatcher fueled laughs for days and nicknames forever ♠ Nice may be smart, but nasty is a lot more fun, proven here, in this ultra-snarky episode!
It’s not “civil unrest,” it’s a Commie coup orchestrated to take down America ▲ The Commie organizations that are behind the violence – NAMED ▲ The REAL reason America teeters on the edge of disaster ▲ The Commie politicians that are helping Antifa take over America – NAMED ▲ What’s really behind cops “taking a knee” – (it’s SICK)▲ The Commie politicians who change their name – same as Hitler, Trotsky and other monsters ▲ It’s OPEN SEASON ON COMMIES at That LARRY SHOW!
Why isCentral Park Karenan omenthatthe 2020SCAMdemicis nearly over?■ What made her do what she did? (It wasn’t fear)■The paths to self destruction and how you can avoid them■The6-letter phrase that protects you from self-destruction■Copper Stallion– the company that’s even dumber than its name ■ Nothing’s more fun that stupid people doing stupid things!
I‘ve not yet seen it called the SCAMdemic, so I’ll plant my flag in that name. Of course, it’s not a hoax, there were plenty of fatalities. But it was NOT the danse macabrethat was promised by “SCIENCE!”
Science has become a very elastic word. Some people think its a synonym for truth. Maybe in Isaac Newton’s day, but 21st century science is laced with bullshit. Because its been politicized.
Oh, and those scienTISTS. Many are assholes claiming to be scientists. There isn’t a lot of standardization for who gets to call themselves a “scientist.” If you think you’re a scientist, then you are one. Like this guy.
Science “communicator.”
He has no credentials in “science.” Zero. So he calls himself a “science communicator” — in the fine print. Neat, huh?
Science and “expert” have become interchangeable. Bill Gates has referred to himself as a “health care expert.” Throwing money at something does not make one an expert. I once threw pennies off of Hoover damn. Does that entitle me to call myself a hydro-electric engineer? In Gates’ and Nye’s world it does.
I don’t claim to be an expert at anything, but I can recognize a trend when I see one. And the recent dust up between this head case
“Hello, Police? There’s a man recording me as I strangle my dog.”
.and some bird-watcher in New York’s Central park is a clear indication that the Scamdemic of 2020 is waning. People are walking dogs, watching birds and getting pissed at each other and then becoming infamous on Twitter. Which says they’re not so worried about the Kung Flu anymore.
Crazy Amy was the inspiration for this episode. Not too often do we see someone self-destruct in a short video as she did. So I thought I’d offer some ideas on how not to self-destruct.
Then there was the bizarre case of Copper Stallion, the wedding videography outfit that self-destructed over a measly $1,800 deposit, which they refused to refund to would-be groom whose fiance died before the wedding.
For decades, Copper Stallion will be a case study in how to destroy a business. Their crowning achievement was setting up a bogus website to brutally mock the customer with the dead fiance. They wisely removed the site, but guess what – the internet never forgets. Some 3rd party archived Copper Stallion’s revenge site, and here it is. Enjoy.
What are the four pillars of inceldom? ♠ What are incels’ secret signals? ♠ What is “skulmogging,” and why is Larry guilty of it? ♠ Why will Incel Terrorism be embraced by law-enforcement (even though it’s bullshit)? ♠ Spotting an Incels by their wardrobe ♠ Names that DOOM a guy to inceldom – if your name’s on the list, change it! ♠ This special Memorial Day episode will help you start your summer right.
This just in from the front-line of the war on males:
CANADA DESIGNATES INCELS “TERRORIST GROUP”
Looks like a comedy headline, but it’s not.
Alleged incel goes into Toronto rub and tug joint (are they legal there?) and hacks up two “masseuses” with a machete. One dies. Attacker had dark web postings on incel forums. So he, and any male not getting laid — and having the audacity to complain about it…is a terrorist.
You don’t have to be psychic to see where this is going. Any male who makes any female “uncomfortable” for any reason, i.e., saying – “Have a nice day,” or “Is this line for ticket holders? or, “Excuse me,” can be prosecuted as a terrorist.
The “expert” in that video braying about the misogyny of incels seems to have no problem with the business where the masseuse was killed.
These images are from the “Crown Spa” website. It’s where the victim was employed.
Does the Crown Spa “objectify” women? It sure looks that way.
Does the mindless PC “expert” (expert at what? Being stupid?) blabbering from :58 to 1:11 in the news video care about that? No. Not even a little. But she does hate males. That’s clear.
Note to RCMP illiterates: Terrorism is when a person or group makes threats to achieve a POLITICAL goal. That’s spelled P-O-L-I-T-I-C-A-L. Unless the Toronto massage parlor hacker was shouting “vote for Trudeau,” as he swung that machete, his was not an act of terrorism.
If there are insufficient threats from which Government can protect us, they’ll invent some. Here’s an additional terrorist threat they may have over-looked.
Justin Trudeau’s face could be Terrorist Threat. It makes many people uncomfortable. Many allege he is Fidel Castro’s son. (Hard to deny when you see their photos together.) Castro was a terrorist and a dictator and a Commie and a murderer so… why hasn’t the RCMP declared the Canadian Prime Minister a Terrorist? The logic holds.
Sonny-boy and Dad?
Meanwhile 99% of incels are kinda pathetic. In this episode, you’ll get a look into their world, a world where every little short-coming, from a petite dick to a “negative canthal tilt” is reason (in their minds) no female would ever want to bed them.
But incels do have their own fight song and it’s not bad. So they’ve got that going for them. Click below and have a listen.
Elliot Roger – has become the poster boy for incels. Which is unfortunate. Is Elliot repulsive?
Elliot Roger. Dead and disgraced.
He’s hardly a troll, is he? Plenty of women might have found him intriguing.
Unlike the Adonis below.
Michael Moore. Rich and famous.
Shouldn’t he be the poster boy for incels?. Instead, many people think he’s smart and witty and watch his shitty movies and his endless TV appearances.
When Elliot Roger looked in a mirror, he probably saw this:
Of course, a cool name helps. There are a gang of awful guys’ names that almost ensure inceldom.
Listen to the episode. If yours is mentioned, change it.
Lastly, it’s Memorial Day weekend – one of the great American holidays – created for the best of all reasons.- to venerate the untold Americans who died in wars to protect our freedoms.
But unlike any previous Memorial Day weekend, many of us will not be visiting the beach. Those wide, sunny and windswept places are closed for your safety.
There will also be no Indianapolis 500. One of the great American spectacles I hope to view in person. (You could not pay me enough to watch a fucking Super Bowl – but the 500 – that’s entertainment!). The 500 been postponed until August. Also for our safety.
But we are ALL FREE to visit Home Depot or Costco and hang around inside a closed area with marginal ventilation. Much, much safer.
The following creeps DO NOT want the pandemic to end: quarantine snitchers, loser-doomers, fear-mongers and panic pushers – why do they love the Wuhan Virus? ▲ What’s the most corrupt organization in the world?▲ Who is “Dr.” Teddy-weddy and why does he suck? ▲ What will the post-pandemic world look like?▲ The hit YouTube video that says the virus is a good thing ▲ If this episode doesn’t piss you off, you’re already dead!
The numbers in my meme are a little off – this is a more accurate accounting: $553,249 in total compensation. Of this total $413,865 was received as a salary, $61,479 was received as benefits and $77,905 came from other types of compensation . This information is according to Los Angeles County payrolls.
Wonder what that $77,905 “other compensation” was for?
Anyone who does not despise politicians must be one.
Eventually, the Wuhan Virus will circulate through the population and no longer be a major threat. But long after the virus is gone, politicians will still be around.
Is anybody working on a way to eliminate politicians?
I hope so.
Also, cretins like this:
Are producing propaganda videos that claim the pandemic is a GOOD thing. That pain, suffering, death and economic collapse was necessary to teach us all a lesson.
And Hollywood wants to transform his shitty, stupid propaganda poem into some type of entertainment.
Watch it. If you like it, you’re on the wrong podcast page.
In this episode, I reveal exactly what his video is all about.
What did Larry’s South Korean girlfriend teach him? ♦ Do dogs bark differently in Korea? ♦Do game show hosts sound the same at home?♦ Why are there no female game-show hosts?♦What’s the soundtrack of your life – 007 or Good, Bad & Ugly?♦ Who is that little man living inside Larry’s head?♦ Why is Jeopardy! the crappiest game show of all time? ♦ What does mung mung mean in Korean? ♦ All this and more in this audio feast of an episode!
