Truth lives at That LARRY SHOW, a weekly sojourn at the crossroads of madness and enlightenment. With LARRY in your life, you'll Take No Sh*t, and laugh your way to victory.
When it’s good to be hated ● How That Larry Show was born ● How Larry came to be America’s Dad ● Guest appearances by Dick Masterson, Sean, Asterios, Kian, Kimball, Nick the Knife and more! ● Podcast formats that should be outlawed ● Achieving self-mastery – the ultimate triumph ● Demolishing your self-made speed bumps ● How Dick Masterson almost got Larry killed ● How episodes of this show changed lives ● All this and more!!!
How Eddie Van Halen delivered my kid ● The 21– year+ Daddy crap-shoot ● Larry’s throw-down in the delivery room ● What did Larry’s wife scream during labor? ● How to re-writeyourbirth certificate ● The Ob/Gyn to the stars ● Fatherhood: is it right for you? ● All this and more inthe2018Father’sDaySpectacular!
Kim Jong Un’s favorite hooker dishes more embarrassing dirt on him • Why Commies suck – explained • The Singapore Summit – why it’s fake and what it’s really about • Why the hive mentality is doomed • How Larry wiped out a wasp nest and is still laughing • Why Communism’s real name is “gimme-what-you-gotism” • What insects say as they die • All this and MORE!!!
Why Jesus wants you to shoot masked punks † Larry sings and picks bluegrass guitar! † How to enjoy your life’s railway † When is your last stop? † How to make yourself fireproof † What you should always stop at tank towns † Why some people are walking Frito bags and you should avoid them † Why Noah’s ark is a non-story † All this and MORE!!!
Why 1- word job titles rule • What’s wrong with Flint, Michigan? • Why you should avoid FBI dancers • Wildwood, N.J. – Come for the beach, stay for the beating! • Translating police radio chatter • How to make any meaninglless job sound important • Unsafe gun handling 101• Fun hoaxes and how to perpetrate them • Why Bigfoot believers should shut up • All this and more!
(Alleged) Police impostors have been hoaxing Flint, Michigan cops, Firemen and Park Rangers for 3 years! 3 Years? Yes. 3 years!
Wow. Are they criminal masterminds?
You be the judge.
Alleged cop impostors/hoaxers.
This just in from Wildwood, N.J.
To Protect and Serve.
You’ve all seen the Wildwood story. Fucking disgusting.
ONLY TRAINED PROFESSIONALS, I.E. COPS – SHOULD HAVE GUNS!
Jackholes who bray the above phrase may want to re-think those words after watching this fucking moron.
Here’s a dancin’ fool who proves that guns, booze and back-flips just don’t mix. It was not easy to find this video without this moron’s face blurred out. Why? Would would just another asshole, behaving like an asshole, get his face shielded by every major news organization? Is he somebody important? Well hell, yeah, he’s an agent in the Federal Bureau of Idiocy. The agency whose name is whspered by some as supreme, cutting edge and beyond reproach.
He dances (like a moron.) He back-flips (barely). He drops his gun. He picks it up. BY THE TRIGGER!!!!! He shoots somebody.
Will he be arrested? No. Denver PD just handed him over to an FBI stupor-visor. Will he face consequences for shooting somebody – as ANY OTHER FUCKING CITIZEN WOULD? No. Because he’s a member of the protected class. Will he lose his job? No. If they fired him, that would indicate that 1) FBI wonks are not pefect like the actors portraying them on Quantico and 2) a government agency might be wrong and not all-powerful, and as we see again and again, the goverment is NEVER wrong!
What do I mean? Read on:
Remember this one from Witchita last December? Watch the video.
There are good cops. And then there is the chicken shit little punk who killed Andrew Finch, a 28-year-old father of two who died because he answered his door. The cop remains nameless, of course, but he was found guiltless because, well, he had a feeling Finch was dangerous. No charges. You did good, son, says the City of Witchita.
Thank you for your service, Officer Shit-bag.
Here’s the Witchita Deputy Chief of Police who took ZERO responsibility for the incompetence of his team of armor-clad SWAT pussies. His name is Troy Livingston and he’s not really a cop. He’s a punk. And a liar.
Weasel.
And then there’s this uniformed politician below. 17 dead on his watch and he’ll never be fired or even disciplined.
Punk.
These badged buffoons are not only killing innocent people, they’re making America hate all cops. All cops are not like the assholes above. Some are damned good people. I know several.
But more good cops need to start calling the assholes assholes, or this problem will only worsen.
How JC trained for the big fight, and you can too • Why JC had balls of steel • How corporate God-Providers edit JC’s words • If Satan had been a pointy chick, would we still be saved? • Is it time to detox? • What did the old man ask Jesus on his way into the desert? • All this and more!!!
Best bonus episode? No. Best episode, period• Desert heat – a mysterious babe in a ‘63 T-bird inflames Larry • Secrets of the desert • How are we really hardwired? • Why you need an IFZ – that’s Interference Free Zone • Why devices and social made have made us more pissed off than ever • Larry shoots a TV like Elvis • The man who became Kirk Cameron • All this and more!
I lived at the beach – not near the beach – ON the beach, for several years. Loved it.
Now I live in the desert that is Los Angeles. If Robert Mulholland and L.A. poltical thugs hadn’t stolen water from central California, L.A. would be a dust bowl. (See movie Chinatown for details.)
But the stolen water only made the dirt green. In other aspects, L.A. is still a desert – devoid of spirituality, devoid of honesty, devoid of honor, devoid of charity. It attracts narcissistic morons like arc lights attract moths. So what am I doing here? Don’t answer that.
Still, I dig the desert. The real desert; the one that’s honest and open and not made hospitable by stolen water. The desert of sand and rocks and scrub and cactus and scorpions and merciless sun. The desert that says “I think I can kill you – let’s see what you’re made of.” If it doesn’t fry you by day it will freeze you by night. That desert.
Along with threat of death, it lures you with seductive beauty. A landscape that changes by the hour. Secrets. Mystery. Hynotic colors. Moaning winds.
When you meet a woman on a beach, there’s no mystery. Bright sun, brief bikini, all is revealed. It’s a Barbie experience. What you see is what you get. Or not. Nice, but lacking adventure. Zero mystery.
When you meet a woman on a dark, desert highway, and she’s driving a Conocurs grade ’63 drop-top Thunderbird hurtling into the void at 75mph, well; that’s another experience entirely, isn’t it?
This is the best episode I’ve ever done. Yeah, it will cost you $5. That’s less than 1/3 the price of the last ticket your purchased for a movie. A movie you had forgotten before you reached the parking lot.
This episode will linger in your mind for a long time. Guranteed. Get it here.
U.S. Civil War II – how will it go down? • What Memorial Day will mean after Civil War II • My visit to Normandy and the ghosts I met on that beach • What are the elements of a true horror story? • Why are East coast beaches better than West coast? • How car dealers and other idiots are wrecking Memorial Day • All this and more!
The beach.
Close your eyes and listen. Gulls, waves.
Sniff. The tang of salt air, coconut sunscreen, hot dogs on a bonfire.
Feel. Humidity in the air, cold spray of a crashing wave, hot sand under foot.
Ever had a bad day at the beach? I haven’t. But much of this episode is about a hell day at one of the world’s most beautiful beaches — Normandy. The world, having had a belly-full of taking shit from the Little Corporal, decided to take no more shit, and instead sling ordnance with a fury that had never before been seen on earth.
When the smoke cleared, thousands were dead. And that’s what Memorial Day is about – D-Day and every other day since 7/4/1776 when some Americans first decided their shit-taking days were over.
It’s hard to stand on that beach at Normandy and not feel small and insignificant. On sand that was soaked in blood. Look out at the machines of war entrapped in the muck, mutely reminding us that freedom isn’t free.
In 1944, America was “one nation under God.” Now, it’s a simmering stew of dozens of whining, demanding, entitled micro-nations who don’t even know what the fuck America is, other than a massive tit that squirts out free everything for anybody.
It’s unsustainable. Eventually, the stew-pot will boil and when it does, U.S. Civil War #2 will be under way. It may have already begun. Nobody called the first Civil War a civil war until it was over.
US Civil War # 2 will have nothing to do with race, and everything to do with ideology.
Here are some pictures I took while visiting Normandy beach.
155mm German canon. Not even rusty after 8 decades.
War machine.
Craters from artillery. Boom.
No soyboys. No snowflakes.
I salute our Armed Forces, on this day after Memorial Day. They are the Take No Shit people.
Episode # 100 fast approaches – Open House at the Dojo. You are ALL invited to call the voice mail and share your thoughts, jokes, rants, whatever. 302-715-2779.
Who was Billy Sunday and how did he top Jesus? • How to spot a hypocrite • Your life: 25,000 days • Now playing – American Idol, The Voice and the Fake J.C. at a church near you! • What’s HTT? • The 7 woes of hypocrisy • Jesus disses the hypocrites • All this, + beer, ribs, and pointy chix!
How to spot phonies • Friends: NY vs LA styles • Feng shui for friendships • Positives, Neutrals, Negatives and Malevolents – what are they and how do they fit in your life? • Larry’s request from a 2-strike felon • The moral dilemma from Episode 92 – solved! • The most dangerous part of success • Who to keep in your life/who to offload • All this and more!!!
How much pain in our lives is self-inflicted? How much comes from others? Answer: damn near all of it is self-inflicted, because we choose most of the people we let into our life.
Once we leave home, it’s up to us whether we stay close to the family or avoid them like ebola. We can choose a solitary life or create our own families to drive us to drink and drugs. We have one life to live – why spend it with assholes?
Think about it, how many times have you wound up punching a hole in the wall because somebody is making you nuts or miserable. Do they ever do that at gunpoint? No? Then why the hell are you hanging around with creeps that bring you down?
Every April 15, Uncle Suck forces us to self audit. Because the last thing we want to do is give that bastard a penny more than we have to. Think of this episode as your chance to audit your relationships. So often, we hang out with people out of habit instead of choice. Why? Because we’re lazy.
It’s time to change things up. This is feng shui for friendships. This will help you take a hard look at the people in your life and put them in their proper place – by your side, between your sheets or out on their ass.
Next month, will post the 100th episode of That LARRY SHOW. That’s a big damn deal, isn’t it? To celebrate right, I’m having a dojo open house. And it’s so damn convenient, you don’t even have to leave your house. Just call my house – at 302-715 -2779. Then, talk. Say whatever you like. It can be about this show, or it can be about the time your dog passed a ping pong ball through his ass. Whatever you want to say to me and other listeners, say it. But do it fast, because I like to edit things tight and if you wait too long, you won’t be heard.
Its going to be a lot of fun.
And speaking of fun, here’s one of the most fun (and pointy) listeners of the show, Keri. She made this vid just for me and I am deeply touched.
