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How Bleeding Jesus Freddie’s Death Bomb nearly killed Larry, Tony Spumonte and Freddie ■ Larry’s throw-down with a Frenchman in Tahiti ■ The sword that made Germany lose WWll ■ How England kicked its own ass in the War for Independence ■ What is America’s secret of success? (You’ll never guess) ■ How did Larry’s law-abiding Dad score illegal fireworks? ■ All this and more in this explosive episode!
I dig the 4th of July. I dig Fireworks. I dig… America.
This episode is about all of the above. And a certain 4th of July I celebrated back on Long Island some time ago. And the infamous Death Bomb.
Almost every time I write these show notes, I think of something I wish I had said in the show. Maybe that’s why I say it here.
Fireworks are a guy thing. Guys love to blow shit up. Make things go boom and bang. And the continued assault on fireworks is an extension of the war on men. There’s no doubt about it. All I see at this time of year are Facebook and Twitter posts from angry females (and males with women’s heads) – bitching about fireworks. And they almost always contain this phrase “ leave it to the professionals!” Fuck them.
I bet if you had sex with any of those women, you would wish you had bedded a professional instead. Because they are all finger-wagging, fun-loathing, uptight, pissed off creatures whose sole mission in life is to make life… a living death. No bad words, no loud noises, no booze, no BBQ, no dirty jokes, just sit at your desk with your hands folded and stare straight ahead and take your medication, you obstreperous, childish male. Nurse Ratchets – that’s what they are. They should be thrown in the Piss Tank. What’s the Piss tank? I explained it fully in a prior episode. When I pinpoint it, I’ll let you know here.
Part of the fun of fireworks is the packaging. The Chinese artwork is almost as loud as the explosions. And I love it, Check these out.
Happy 4th of July. Destroy all Commies. God Bless America.
Write to Larry thatlarryshow@gmail.com
Call the Take No Shit Dojo : 302-71-Larry